MAYBE IT HELPS TO KNOW WHO YOU’RE TALKING TO. if read this far that’s what I’m getting. I mean is it her father her lover herself and I get that her father’s dead I get that fallen from some accident as accidents happen to ironworkers maybe it was a new hospital in that line of work you have to be used to heights and then there’s stuff about George and his girlfriend and how that relates to her boyfriend Mason and we know she likes to play golf played with her father we know that and somehow this all ties in with the VA and Silk Road and the darknet and George’s story from another story and his folks his dad and Mason’s folks how his mom got religious how apparently she got religious (or has that been mentioned) and remember the she we’re referring to her name’s V and we have all this background and mood impressions and I get that it’s being told like she’s sitting in front of a computer posting a YouTube video but I can’t tell you what the story’s about maybe the title’s supposed to help comes from a Christmas Carol a Hemingway story “God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen” maybe that has something to do with I don’t know and then I realized you don’t even know who this I is talking to you and who are you and maybe that’s it. Maybe this whole thing is like a giant Rorschach. The question is not really what the story’s about I mean we learn that in school—identify the author the illustrator the title of the book—and as we get older we’re numbed by formulas and we don’t even know we want anything more anything less just to be entertained as we accept our mediocrity and with humility and maybe a spark of humor our plot in life. So ya I get there’s no plot. Other than the fact V’s mourning her father’s death and apparently her lover’s Mason’s recent suicide and this apparently stems from the fact he was involved in dealing drugs off of Silk Road with George who I guess got in trouble for writing some story on the darknet called The Tale of Two Cats which pissed off his girlfriend who shot his dog which brought the cops and the heat on their nefarious dealings and apparently besides all that Mason I guess was a little dude and was bullied a lot for his height (and he was scared of heights) and add in the stressors of the possibility of getting busted by the cops (and apparent rumors scandals at the VA that not only George was involved in darknet deals but V’s ex-stepdad who also worked at the VA and bought the house George lived in in another story was also involved in a scandal of stealing patient information and selling it on the darknet) of course I don’t know these rumors to be true but I’m sure whispered conversations got to him and add the weight that V was thinking of dumping him for a relationship with Jesus (which really hasn’t been mentioned yet but it is being now and this makes sense since she too was under a lot of stress the least of them being defending herself from the accusation that she also may have ratted out Mason and George letting the police in on the when and where of his mail deliveries) put that all together and the fact that he was young too and well you can see why maybe he took his own life because at that age with your whole life ahead of you it’s easy to say fuck it because your whole life’s still ahead of you. Anyway I guess that’s the plot. It’s just been told in a funny way. And maybe that’s really the story—not the story being told—but your interpretation of it. How you would go about telling someone else what the story’s about. So the question is not really what’s revealed in the story but what’s revealed about one who tells it. Maybe that’s why so much is left out. Why so much of this other crap has been put in. So you can see what you want to see… Anyway you’ll never have the whole truth and nothing but. I mean from what I heard after hearing her YouTube diaries and seeing George’s darknet posts which look like they could come out of a Bukowski Bible I know that that’s not all. I mean wouldn’t it be nice to know that in fact George’s girlfriend was pissed off and humiliated that he turned her cat into a gimp sure but that’s not the whole story just like sure we’re made up of water and energy and our very conscious thoughts influence the energy around us but life can still take a big dump on you despite all your positive thinking and the trigger here was not really George turning her cat into a gimp on a good day she might have let that simply slip off her shoulders and laugh about it but the day she shot his dog in the face wasn’t a good day. See her car was parked next door. She’d had that car for eleven years—bought it when she graduated. I think it might even be tied with her first boyfriend her first relationship I’m not sure you know how cars typify our status be it economic or social or even relationship-wise. Anyway after nearly two hundred thousand miles and taking it coast to coast she sold it to her next door neighbor after the engine went out. He’s a story in itself been married three times has seven kids and he’ll admit he was a righteous asshole in his younger years telling yarns such as drinking a fifth of tequila every morning before getting out of bed then doing lines of coke to stay awake now he’s mellowed a bit and wants to be an evangelical preacher but mostly he just deals in cars you saw different ones in his driveway everyday as he fixed them up and sold them. Well now hers was next door. It’s kind of a psychological shock to see the car you once owned for so long a time and with which you’ve been through so much sitting next door and now you don’t own it especially when you’re still carless. Plus she liked to give him sass and now she knew she would never live this down. So see this might have a weighing in factor on why she shot George’s pit bull in the face. We hold our cars in as much esteem as our cats… Anyway it’s funny isn’t it? What you don’t know is usually revealed by what you do. and if that ain’t what this story’s about I don’t know what the hell is

CONTINUANCE…

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