and I see a cat looking over its shoulder—at me

so Kenneth Dean thinks but doesn’t say:

be careful what you’re dreamin’ because you say I want love and want is there in your eyes eyes that say Do not hurt me but by the do not you do you set yourself up for it counting on the kindness of strangers and if you were really kind you would not say Be kind for the assertion would already be there in the kindness and so damn them damn the lonely people and where they come from for I want to tell him to just go home Go home to where you came from Go back but do not hide in the illusion of your shyness the exaggerated vanity that says Look at me but do not hurt Look at me and love but do not touch for if you touch me it’s like lifting the lid on a white-washed sepulcher what’s dead inside only living in a dream a dream which says Be sad as I am sad for sadness is the only truth I know the only truth which allows this dream to be…

You’re settin’ yourself up for a broken heart, kid
Yes but baby I’m a genius and nobody knows it but me

the reality is there before your reality—the foundations of your world. you look and it plays out how you look because it ain’t that hard to get somebody to love you—you only have to let them

and he knew the horror the horror of saying so this is me now love it when any five year old kid could tell him that could tell him what a child seeks from a father but it takes an old man to know what glorifies the father sanctifies the son and to finish to finish well it’s not about you it never was for the one thing you take from this world is it doesn’t love you you can love it all you want and all your people in it but it’s as fickle as a woman as fickle as a stray cat being fed because attention is cold never warm and the focus is always intense and better to give your attention to the world than to ask for attention from it for it is always better to say I love than to ask beg borrow from the words: Love me please… better to love than to be loved but ask any child before it is man or woman and you’ll get the same answer—teach a child in the way he should go and he will follow it all the days of his life

The thing is it’s never taught. It is the inherent unhappiness of humanity. All you have to do is just picture the words see him in your mind and remember—Daddy…

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