So I figured it up and said to the woman who gave me birth This is not my house but His the incest the murder the curse of a man rejected by his father how he slayed a giant and befriended a man not against what he was against but for what he was for and he took me from my husband only to mourn his child the spirit of Lust the cause of his contrition this the why of my son the old woman saying Yes and do you think this your alliance puts you in the Good? Good stands divided but Evil does not quarrel with itself it knows its purpose with confidence for a house divided cannot stand… And I heard as it were the mechanism of Time as it is dead measured by turning wheels and of old as it was the sun and moon the turning of the Earth and its seasons all I see seen at a faint angle the precession so that when I say What time is it? Time is dead but when I know not the hour or the day it comes to life and I saw… Her clock or clocks for she had many of them I heard them tick for they were on her mantel they lined her walls even among the skulls of animals heard above even the incessant cluck of hens the cages she kept in the dark the only illumination the melting wax of candles and she Marie Toussaint in the shadows among her clocks all of them ticking ticking telling a different time and besides the Cross about her neck she wore a large man’s watch this too telling a different time a dozen different hours and all of them with the same assertive contradiction the same assurance I had for she asked me What time is it? and I looked to my own watch and told her just like how when you don’t want to do a thing your body will try to trick you into doing it and it says Why do you persecute me? and Time if it could talk if you would only listen saying It is all to bless you… like when Jesus walked in Galilee waiting for His time and when He says Rise you look down to see your murmuring bones and the deep water realizing that nothing can help you when you know you don’t need help when Time comes to life when you hear it… Marie Toussaint saying Yes and that’s what’s sad about it for nothing is even worth the changing of it for I could go from clock to clock and I could set my watch and say This is it this is the time and would that could that give you all the assurance that you need? Would that change what was and what is to come? So I said It is the best thing then: to see them my family all the people whom I love not as I think they are but how they think they are and this I should let them share… And she said Yes because all your speculation regarding the mechanism of all these arbitrary turning wheels is merely the symptom of your mind. It is the heart which leads it is the heart which sees God…

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