“and what did he see?”

“well what he wanted to see like I said because the sky don’t know there’s a ground below and the ground don’t know there’s a sky above that’s a distinction of the mind when it looks upon itself and judges makes a discernment of I am this and you are that and what do you do when you don’t feel it when there is no love only a negativity and there was a negative when he came into that room and that’s what he saw like the negative of a photo we were like something he could only see if there was light behind us a light to shine through but sometimes that destroys what’s in a dark room what later becomes the picture what blurs in motion and we froze and he froze and it was like he said, ‘I love…’ but there was nothing after it.  You see?  Because that’s a discernment.  When you say, ‘I love…’–well, what?  Who?  He knew me, but he didn’t love me.  In fact he came up to that room with the intention to kill me.   And Maddie, well that’s like something you think you had but you don’t have it no more and then you all by yourself alone have to wonder, ‘Did I have it?  Did I know what love is?’ Because how do you feel that?  How does a woman make you feel that and then take it away?  The negative don’t know nothin’ ’bout the positive otherwise it wouldn’t be what it is and it’s like saying, ‘God is love’ so he must have been he must have felt what God isn’t.  And that’s a strange thing you know because it’s easy to say that’s the ground and that’s sky and if you go this way it’s north and the other way south but how can you say what God is and isn’t?  Maybe it’s all a direction and not a place.  It all depends on where you are and where you want to go.  Maybe you can only feel just like how you show your feelings how you say this feels bad or this feels good and this only in a moment in time cuz I don’t have to tell you how a woman makes you feel both and it can be the same damn thing just like how you can say to anybody this person loves me but that person don’t or she loved me then but she don’t love me now how if I play this note and then this one on my guitar it takes you one place but if I play another note it takes you somewhere else because it’s all a direction a discernment of the mind and only God can look at all without judgment…  I can tell you he wasn’t happy.  Only fools place that burden on a woman it just ain’t what a man does but it gives the world its saddest sound.  It gives me my profession.  And I tell you what–if it hadn’t of been for Maddie you’d be talking to a dead man right now…”

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