There’s one thing an honest man can’t quit.   When you’re honest you can be who you are.  And you don’t—you don’t have to be ashamed of it—there’s nothing to change when you can accept being honest.  It’s just that sometimes it can’t be agreed on.  What you feel in being honest can seem dishonest to another person.  And maybe it’s a matter of values.  Priorities.  Everybody has a different number one.  Usually themselves.  And the strange thing is how despite this we’re capable of getting along.  In the basics.  How two realities can become one.  This called married life.  And then children.  Their realities…  It’s what Bethany was thinking about.  Besides herself.  So at first she was skeptical of David seeking out this Franklin Meeks.  Even in her sickness she was able to doubt—her supplication protecting something she trusted no one with—not even David.  And maybe David knew.  He saw it in her eyes, and he remembered what he saw there before.  It was unsaid, but said in so many words.  In the actions.  The gestures.  A prophecy was hanging over them.  Not just from an old homeless man in the French Quarter and his talk of seeds and holding a job so soon after their marriage, but what they were before they ever met—this in their first sight of each other leading to what happened in that drug deal gone bad with Popovitch and Pete Southhouse.  It was in their affair when she came to him on the West Bank.  And maybe you could call it an independence. The conflict stirred in the silence after their eyes met.  That intuition, that definition David sought in seeing that dog being walked—what he wanted to show his wife in his eyes when he came home to her—his soul—in that way identifying with her and her independence, her past.  In that compromise of respect.  In that seeing of a soul and loving it even if you know if you do it can hurt you…  But that’s the funny thing about time in its storage of it—by loving a soul it can hurt you—in that he/she of wills.  It hurts you because you make it a part of your soul, personally, and not just in that community that’s convenient when talking about connectedness and similarities.  You know you’re hurt when you recognize it, but you do it anyway—you’re hurt every time you recognize a soul…  And that’s the one thing an honest man can’t quit.  When you’re honest you don’t lie about this recognition.  Even when it hurts you.  And so maybe that’s why David couldn’t lie.  What was in his compulsion to find that native healer living in the American Bottom.  He saw it.  In her eyes.  Her words.  In her actions and gestures.  He saw the hate was there even before the love and he thought he could heal it…

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